Robbie Lesiuk

I thought I would start this post in the style of a letter to “Points of View”. It’s relevant too, because I have a complaint about television.

It’s not against a show however, but commercials. More specifically, the commercials done in a “Vox Pops” style, but which are rather obviously scripted and played by actors. Clearly not very good actors, as more talented thespians may have convinced me it was all genuine. Also, I’m sure one of them turned up as a prostitute on “The Bill” a couple of weeks ago.

I don’t know why is annoys me so much, it’s not like I believe there’s any great truth to other adverts. Maybe it’s because I don’t care what random idiots on the street think in the first place, therefore why would anyone think actors pretending to be random idiots on the street would convince me to buy something.

I say less fake vox pops and more commercials doing stuff with bits of cars. I like those. 

In any recording of a live concert, or any concert footage on TV, there always seems to exist the same phenomenon. People cheer when the band plays their favourite song. This is a good thing, but what tends to annoy me is that the cheering never seems to start until the first words are sung. Regardless of how long the intro has gone on before it.

Maybe I am biased, because I play guitar, but surely you cheer favourite song at the opening guitar lines? Is the throbbing bass introduction not worthy of your applause? Or do people simply not recognise what song is playing until it is confirmed by the lyric?

One of the most recognisable introductions in the history of pop music has to be the plinky-plonky piano intro to “Close to You” by The Carpenters. I’m not a great fan of The Carpenters, but I am fairly sure none of their other songs begin in the same way. Yet, picture the scene; The Carpenters are headlining Glastonbury 2008, they have yet to play their most famous song, it’s getting to the end of their set… when… “Do-doo-d-do-doo….” the piano strikes up that instantly recognisable hook. Silence. Four bars later, Karen Carpenter sings, “Why do bi…” and before she finishes the third word, the place erupts in an overjoyed spackload of cheers and screams.

Of course, Karen Carpenter selfishly had to go and starve herself to death, so my theory can never be tested. Thanks a fucking bunch Karen.